That's when the irony hit me...
title: Wade in de Water by ?????
do you ever find yourself being holden? (it helps if you read Catcher in the Rye i suppose...) i do. i know i do. to an alarming degree, i identify with this child.
i've very good at finding reasons not to like people. god, i'm an expert at it. i find myself saying silly little things like "she talks way too much," "she's so self-centered," and my all time favorite: "they're just so immature,"
the last one is the most interesting, and concerning in my opinion. how can i, at the age of eighteen, claim to be more mature than my peers. i'm not saying that i don't believe i am, because i certainly do, but why do i think i have the ultimate authority on this matter? why do i get to decide?
the answer is i don't. i dont' get to say that. i don't get to say i'm more mature than someone else. i've always been someone with a short fuse. not in the sense that i'm angered easily, but more that i'm annoyed easily. very easily. i don't take the time and patience people need and deserve. i do believe that i am more mature than most people in my grade. it's not unfounded either, i'm also one of the oldest people in my grade. one of my best friends is older too (marissa's only three weeks younger than me), and the other...well i think she's just old for her age (miss jenna, the young'un).
i don't want to isolate so much anymore, but at the same time, i'm not interested in the group of friends i've been in for years. i'm just so discontented. i don't know what i want.
GAH!
-holden caulfield
